Comments on: Quitting the Right Way

By: Site Wrap - June 2009 | Start Being Your Best

Site Wrap - June 2009 | Start Being Your Best — Fri, 03 Jul 2009 12:03:09 +0000

[...] Quitting the Right Way: This post was spawned out of some issues I’ve had in the past with being hesitant to try things because I’m afraid of committing to something I can’t finish. I think there are certain times when it’s justifiable to quit, but those are few and far between. The key to this, like many other things, is to quit lying to yourself. I wrote about my Dad in this post, and he came over and chimed in in the comments. That was fun. [...]

By: Want to Fail? Just Repeat These 3 Phrases Daily | LifeDev

Want to Fail? Just Repeat These 3 Phrases Daily | LifeDev — Wed, 01 Jul 2009 19:31:50 +0000

[...] it? It assumes certain success, rather than just avoiding failure (because, as we all know, you can avoid failing without really [...]

By: Dad

Dad — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 22:55:33 +0000

Whoaa! Hold on there a minute, pard. I said I couldn't remember that you played soccer. But that was 25 yrs +/- ago. You know how my memory is…. If you say you played, I don't doubt it. I just don't remember it.

By: Jason D Barr

Jason D Barr — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 21:14:39 +0000

Great story, CLangdell! This doesn't apply only to jobs, but I think it's definitely one area where many folks get hung up. Thanks for commenting!

By: Jason D Barr

Jason D Barr — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 21:14:02 +0000

Thanks, Dad. Now I'm embarrassed. And, now that I think about it, you might be right; the soccer thing may have happened at a tryout or something. What can I say? I was five and my memory of the specifics is admittedly hazy…

By: CLangdell

CLangdell — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 09:55:26 +0000

Thanks Steve – I hope so. It's funny but once I'd taken the leap it felt like everything was going to be ok and I'm now really looking forward to discovering what comes next

By: Dad

Dad — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 04:51:49 +0000

Hi, Son! Figured I should weigh in on this one since I was referred to more than once. I must confess that I don’t recall giving my OK to you quitting peewee soccer. But then again, I’m not sure I remember that you even played – really. My memory is quite strong however, regarding the “no quitting allowed” ruling in our home. That mandate actually had its root in an occasion when I quit something in my youth. I quit the cross country team in my senior year of high school. For the record, I hated CC. But I was participated because the coach (also the head Track Coach) required it if you didn’t play football. Track was my sport, you likely recall that. But much shorter distances were my forte`. I had finally made the CC varsity team. But in the meets, I always choked. Bad, really BAD. So bad that members of the reserve squads would pass me on the way to the finish line. My self image was in toilet over that and I quit – against my coach’s strong encouragement no to. Not only that, I didn’t even go out for track in my senior year. I quit. I really quit. And to this very day I regret it. Why? Because there was no reason to. I could’ve learned more about persistence while failing instead of letting myself off the hook. Such is the immaturity of youth, no offense to youth.

Here is a point I’d like to submit for consideration: if you feel you must quit something, FIRST – ask yourself if you’re quitting just to get away because you don’t like the results you’re getting now OR are you quitting to SPECIFICALLY move toward something better. Not some nebulous “I’m sure I’ll be happier” feeling that can’t be rationally supported. But an ACTUAL GOAL-ORIENTED movement in a positive direction toward your dream. Now, if you can honestly say that’s the case (remember, stop lying to yourself) then go ahead. Quit the negative and move to the positive. But remember, learning and growth and victory happen in the darkness of the valley (when you want to quit). The mountain top is for celebrating and that’s great. But don’t cheat yourself of the real value that can only be gained by enduring the pain.

I think you’re the BEST!

By: steveweaver

steveweaver — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 17:56:39 +0000

I applaud that decision CLangdell!! Not having an income is so scary for many people they can not even consider it. It takes courage to have the faith in yourself and the self-esteem to to that. Realizing that your mental and emotional health are also important signals to me that you'll be just fine.

By: CLangdell

CLangdell — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 13:06:41 +0000

I have recently come to some of the very same conclusions!

I had been in my job for just over two years and had known for the last year that it wasn't working the way it should. I thought I could get through it and that quitting would be an admission of failure so I stayed in an attempt to make it better.

That last year has had a negative affect on my confidence, my self esteem and my health and so at the beginning of this month I quit. I don't have another job to go to and I am not completly sure what the future holds yet as soon as handed in my notice I knew it was the right thing to do and wished I had had the courage to do it much earlier.

Now I'd like to make it clear that I am not recommending everyone do what I did but I do think it's important to recognise that in some cases quitting is not only acceptable but neccesary.